Friday, September 28, 2007
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
A note from Michael
Some one asked about my fatherly talks with my children prior to their wedding day. My practice has been to take them out to dinner very close to the wedding date, like two days before and explain to them 'the way of a man with his maid'. I do this not months or weeks ahead, but a day or two ahead, so that they will not have knowledge before they need it. Corrie Ten Boom' s father said to her one day when they were getting on a train, ' Corrie, some knowledge is like a train ticket. When do I give you your train ticket?' 'Just before boarding, Father.' 'Yes. And so it is with knowledge in some areas of life.'
In today's lewd society, it is a sobering and wonderful privilege to treat God's gift of intimacy with the fatherly care it so richly deserves and to see the wonder of it all preserved carefully in the lives of young people about to be married.
I understand the ladies will be posting soon on the order of the wedding day and the symbolism of the different parts of the ceremony. Stay tuned.
In today's lewd society, it is a sobering and wonderful privilege to treat God's gift of intimacy with the fatherly care it so richly deserves and to see the wonder of it all preserved carefully in the lives of young people about to be married.
I understand the ladies will be posting soon on the order of the wedding day and the symbolism of the different parts of the ceremony. Stay tuned.
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Guest Blog
Greetings! Isn't this September weather gorgeous?!! We are clipping pastures and building fences, Wesley and Rachel are settling in and Kressant is getting over a sickness.
If you would like an excellent photo essay of the wedding ceremony , go to refinersfireforge.com/blog/. 'Photos by Abbi' are featured here and they are great.
Enjoy Fall!
If you would like an excellent photo essay of the wedding ceremony , go to refinersfireforge.com/blog/. 'Photos by Abbi' are featured here and they are great.
Enjoy Fall!
Saturday, September 15, 2007
A note from Mom
We appreciate the interest and questions that have been sent to us. It is very important to communicate within the Body of Christ , amongst Christians, so that we can all learn and grow and change. If your question is of a personal nature, please email Michael B. at calathora@alltel.net.
Another note from Mom....................
Michael B. leads us with the Word of God as his Guide and he takes the whole shooting match, so to speak. In the Scriptures , God says that what is desired of a man is his kindness. So, Michael B. leads us and gives his counsel and direction with great wisdom -- and kindness. He is very firm where the Word is firm and he gives grace where the Word gives grace. He treats his adult sons with respect and honor, but then they treat him with reverence and respect. When they marry, he honors, with the fear of God, the sanctity of the new household and gives deference to their new position as married men in the circle of the extended family. The Biblical model in any area of life works best when we apply the whole thing.
And some more questions.....................
We are very grateful that our married sons have built homes and do indeed live near the paternal side of the family, but they are certainly not required to - they just recognize the blessing of extended family!!
No, we do not live near the Smith family. And we do not know what their plans are pertaining to the sale of their home. They are very precious and very hospitable and we have enjoyed welcoming our new 'daughters in love' into our family circle.
Another note from Mom....................
Michael B. leads us with the Word of God as his Guide and he takes the whole shooting match, so to speak. In the Scriptures , God says that what is desired of a man is his kindness. So, Michael B. leads us and gives his counsel and direction with great wisdom -- and kindness. He is very firm where the Word is firm and he gives grace where the Word gives grace. He treats his adult sons with respect and honor, but then they treat him with reverence and respect. When they marry, he honors, with the fear of God, the sanctity of the new household and gives deference to their new position as married men in the circle of the extended family. The Biblical model in any area of life works best when we apply the whole thing.
And some more questions.....................
We are very grateful that our married sons have built homes and do indeed live near the paternal side of the family, but they are certainly not required to - they just recognize the blessing of extended family!!
No, we do not live near the Smith family. And we do not know what their plans are pertaining to the sale of their home. They are very precious and very hospitable and we have enjoyed welcoming our new 'daughters in love' into our family circle.
Friday, September 14, 2007
Questions and Answers :)
While we're all waiting for pictures, we thought we'd take a minute to answer some of the great questions we've been getting on how the Morton Clan handles some of the aspects of Love and Marriage.......so, here goes.
"What is the distinction (in your practice) between betrothal and marriage?" someone asked.
Answer: There is one main distinction and it has numerous ramifications. The way our family has done it , the headship of the young lady - the authority structure in her life (I Cor. 11:3) - is formally and practically transferred to the young gentleman upon their betrothal , except in one crucial area - the physical. She still lives with her parents, and there is no intimate touching - and some Dads set up the rules so that there is not even holding hands! The young lady begins to be sensitive to her husband-to-be in preferences of dress, conduct, priorities, etc., as she has been to her father. The young man begins to serve communion to his betrothed, reads her the scriptures and prays with her.
There are many phone calls!! There is much conversation and sharing of hearts and thoughts. The wedding plans are talked about at great length and many fun moments shared. This is a sweet time of much conversation , because that is the only way they can relate to each other!!! (We require a chaperone at all times, and that gets funny sometimes as brothers and sisters get pressed into chaperonage duty. )
But the father, and here is the "distinction" between betrothal and marriage, retains authority over the young lady from a physical standpoint. To us , this in an interim time and so it is best kept to 21\2 - 4 months, in our opinion - better shorter than longer.
"Does the groom really pay the bride's father a monetary sum?" was another question.
We like the symbolism of the 'bride price' - we see it as mirroring Christ having paid the price to satisfy the legal debt that our sin created. He paid in blood - His own blood. Our symbolic payment of the 'bride price' is just that - a symbol. We have seen silver given to the bride's father in various ways - rough bars , minted bars and coins. You could use gold, sterling flatware, livestock, oil stocks - the only limits are your creativity.
There are at least three ways of doing a 'bride price' that we know of - all quite different. Some have the bridegroom pay an agreed upon amount to the father of the bride and he then gives it to the bride for her to invest. Some fathers-of-the-bride send the valuable symbol with the bride for her and\or her husband to invest and some bridegrooms give the agreed upon symbol to the bride's father and he keeps it for the bride's future use or uses it or just keeps it in a box. So who pays whom and what is done with the bride price has varied in history and recent practice. It would make a fascinating study. We make no claim to be an authority on the subject.
"How did Wesley raise the bride price for Rachel?" was another question.
Wesley is very blessed to have a position in Morton and Sons Construction,Inc. He is a grown man in every sense of the word and has worked a full time job for years. We broke ground on their home several months ago and are working towards its completion. He has been faithful and honored his parents and things look well for him. He just needs to keep abiding in the Vine - but don't we all.
"What is the main scriptural basis for a betrothal ceremony?"
We are not really aware of a 'scriptural' basis for the betrothal ceremony - just a desire to share the good news with friends and family. Just wait 'till we post about the WEDDING ceremony , though and we'll really have lots of scriptural symbolism to share with you!!!
Well, there you have it. Betrothal or father- directed, involved marriage is so romantic, fun, and just plain wonderful that we could post for pages on it. We have seen three 'up close and personal' so far and the freedom , peace, joy and the incredible romance of it just sets the whole world a-singing with you!!
Well, there are a few answers. Hope that was helpful.
"What is the distinction (in your practice) between betrothal and marriage?" someone asked.
Answer: There is one main distinction and it has numerous ramifications. The way our family has done it , the headship of the young lady - the authority structure in her life (I Cor. 11:3) - is formally and practically transferred to the young gentleman upon their betrothal , except in one crucial area - the physical. She still lives with her parents, and there is no intimate touching - and some Dads set up the rules so that there is not even holding hands! The young lady begins to be sensitive to her husband-to-be in preferences of dress, conduct, priorities, etc., as she has been to her father. The young man begins to serve communion to his betrothed, reads her the scriptures and prays with her.
There are many phone calls!! There is much conversation and sharing of hearts and thoughts. The wedding plans are talked about at great length and many fun moments shared. This is a sweet time of much conversation , because that is the only way they can relate to each other!!! (We require a chaperone at all times, and that gets funny sometimes as brothers and sisters get pressed into chaperonage duty. )
But the father, and here is the "distinction" between betrothal and marriage, retains authority over the young lady from a physical standpoint. To us , this in an interim time and so it is best kept to 21\2 - 4 months, in our opinion - better shorter than longer.
"Does the groom really pay the bride's father a monetary sum?" was another question.
We like the symbolism of the 'bride price' - we see it as mirroring Christ having paid the price to satisfy the legal debt that our sin created. He paid in blood - His own blood. Our symbolic payment of the 'bride price' is just that - a symbol. We have seen silver given to the bride's father in various ways - rough bars , minted bars and coins. You could use gold, sterling flatware, livestock, oil stocks - the only limits are your creativity.
There are at least three ways of doing a 'bride price' that we know of - all quite different. Some have the bridegroom pay an agreed upon amount to the father of the bride and he then gives it to the bride for her to invest. Some fathers-of-the-bride send the valuable symbol with the bride for her and\or her husband to invest and some bridegrooms give the agreed upon symbol to the bride's father and he keeps it for the bride's future use or uses it or just keeps it in a box. So who pays whom and what is done with the bride price has varied in history and recent practice. It would make a fascinating study. We make no claim to be an authority on the subject.
"How did Wesley raise the bride price for Rachel?" was another question.
Wesley is very blessed to have a position in Morton and Sons Construction,Inc. He is a grown man in every sense of the word and has worked a full time job for years. We broke ground on their home several months ago and are working towards its completion. He has been faithful and honored his parents and things look well for him. He just needs to keep abiding in the Vine - but don't we all.
"What is the main scriptural basis for a betrothal ceremony?"
We are not really aware of a 'scriptural' basis for the betrothal ceremony - just a desire to share the good news with friends and family. Just wait 'till we post about the WEDDING ceremony , though and we'll really have lots of scriptural symbolism to share with you!!!
Well, there you have it. Betrothal or father- directed, involved marriage is so romantic, fun, and just plain wonderful that we could post for pages on it. We have seen three 'up close and personal' so far and the freedom , peace, joy and the incredible romance of it just sets the whole world a-singing with you!!
Well, there are a few answers. Hope that was helpful.
and another question.....................
Folks are asking the best questions! It is so exciting to have people really connect with something that is going on in your family's life and want to know all about it.
Sometimes an easy way to understand something is to know what it is not.
Michael B. does not pick out someone and tell his children - Here is your betrothed.
Our children make a diligent, prayerful effort not to 'notice' or familiarly interact with the opposite sex. They know that flirting is dishonorable and even looked down upon by the kind of people they would want to marry! And they know we would correct them if they did it - and besides, they do not want to 'flirt'.
It is Michael B. - and yours truly - who keep our ears and hearts open and Michael watches and prays.
Wesley said it well at his betrothal ceremony - "I've been trying not to notice Rachel for about a year and a half" ! His comment brought the house down!
There are hardly words to describe the joy of young people who keep their hearts and eyes to themselves and whose fathers are diligently staying in contact with families that would suit their children.......And , then , those faithful Dads talk with each other and pray together and seek the Lord about whether He would have them marry. The young people are brought into the process at an appropriate point - the whole process is just so neat.
The young people are largely protected from emotional bonding that doesn't end in marriage.
It does happen - they don't live in cloisters and everything doesn't always go according to plan, but for the most part, it is a journey to Marriage that is edifying to the whole family and is incredibly romantic.
You know, everyone's got a 'line'. Some folks draw their 'line' one place and some another. We have seen the Lord graciously give superlative fruit at drawing the 'line' waaaaaaay out there - not just 'hands' to yourself, but eyes and hearts and emotions and dreams, too. So , when you stand before the officiant at your wedding ,looking up at your beloved , there is a clarity and sparkle in the eye that is truly precious.
Another question
What is "the phone call"?
Here at our farm, Calathora, we've enjoyed having the best man ride up on a horse and announce the bridegroom's coming, and then the bridegroom rides up. The starting point is a quarter mile down the lane and "the phone call" is simply Michael B.'s way of alerting the guys that IT'S TIME!!!!!
On a side note, the cell phones weren't working at the rehearsal, so we substituted waving a red handkerchief - worked great!!
Here at our farm, Calathora, we've enjoyed having the best man ride up on a horse and announce the bridegroom's coming, and then the bridegroom rides up. The starting point is a quarter mile down the lane and "the phone call" is simply Michael B.'s way of alerting the guys that IT'S TIME!!!!!
On a side note, the cell phones weren't working at the rehearsal, so we substituted waving a red handkerchief - worked great!!
Thursday, September 13, 2007
The Wedding!
Hello, dear friends!
A wonderful morning to you! I pray you are all well!
We are all trying to get everything back to "normal" over here, {return rented items, wash, er~bleach table clothes and napkins, not mentioning washing regular laundry, and cleaning up the house and grounds} trying to get settled back in from one of the most blessed weekends in our lives!! Ahh!!! I can't wait to give y'all my little spill about the whole thing in the next day or two, and give you some more pictures! Our Uncle Jerry was so dear, and sent us his delightful collection, which we have all enjoyed here... The ones from 'The Photographer's" have not arrived yet, :) but when they do, I hope to share some of our favorites with you all!
I will share my "Addie's To Do" list for the day....I know y'all really want to hear that sort of "useless trivia"... ;) Here goes my lot for the beautiful, blessed day of September 12!! Thank You, Lord Jesus, for this lovely day!
*Blog {:)}
*Clean first floor
* finish hemming unfinished project # -, so I can start another one.
*apply poison ivy treatment to beautiful outbreak on face, left hand and right foot.
*Take laundry basket of Wesley's stuff to his house
*Transport a lovely assortment of wedding gifts to W&R's home
*organize cd's, vhs's and dvd's in TV cabinet, throw away accumulation of junk
*set mouse traps around house
*Ask Mama what to do with leftover wedding invites, and clean out the letter writing desk
* call library and re-rent over due books {beg librarian for mercy}
* find over due books
*Throw away dead cut flowers, refill with fresh ones
Well, there is.
May God help all of us today as we endeavor to serve Him. May He remind you, as He kindly reminded me today, of the importance of rising up , and calling our mothers and fathers blessed, and honoring them. May the Lord help me.
Y'all have a wonderful day, now!
Over and out,
Adeline
A wonderful morning to you! I pray you are all well!
We are all trying to get everything back to "normal" over here, {return rented items, wash, er~bleach table clothes and napkins, not mentioning washing regular laundry, and cleaning up the house and grounds} trying to get settled back in from one of the most blessed weekends in our lives!! Ahh!!! I can't wait to give y'all my little spill about the whole thing in the next day or two, and give you some more pictures! Our Uncle Jerry was so dear, and sent us his delightful collection, which we have all enjoyed here... The ones from 'The Photographer's" have not arrived yet, :) but when they do, I hope to share some of our favorites with you all!
I will share my "Addie's To Do" list for the day....I know y'all really want to hear that sort of "useless trivia"... ;) Here goes my lot for the beautiful, blessed day of September 12!! Thank You, Lord Jesus, for this lovely day!
*Blog {:)}
*Clean first floor
* finish hemming unfinished project # -, so I can start another one.
*apply poison ivy treatment to beautiful outbreak on face, left hand and right foot.
*Take laundry basket of Wesley's stuff to his house
*Transport a lovely assortment of wedding gifts to W&R's home
*organize cd's, vhs's and dvd's in TV cabinet, throw away accumulation of junk
*set mouse traps around house
*Ask Mama what to do with leftover wedding invites, and clean out the letter writing desk
* call library and re-rent over due books {beg librarian for mercy}
* find over due books
*Throw away dead cut flowers, refill with fresh ones
Well, there is.
May God help all of us today as we endeavor to serve Him. May He remind you, as He kindly reminded me today, of the importance of rising up , and calling our mothers and fathers blessed, and honoring them. May the Lord help me.
Y'all have a wonderful day, now!
Over and out,
Adeline
Our dear cousin Avery serving at the feast~What a blessing folks are! Mr Donnie H. and Mr. Marc D. and a host of dear family and friends fixed up a huge feast that was so beautifully prepared and presented! The menu is as follows:
Calathora House Salad
Grilled Prim Rib au Jus
Sauteed Green Beans
Garlic New Potatoes
Whole Wheat Flax Loaves
Iced Sweet Tea
Wedding Cake and Aunt Wanda's Punch ( Aunt Lori helped with the beautiful punch, too)
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
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